All Star notes: Vlad wins HR Derby w/ a little help from Big Papi

Guerrero is going to owe his buddy a steak dinner after Papi assisted in his Derby win

With a bat handed to him by good buddy and fellow Dominican David Ortiz, Vlad Guerrero won the 2007 State Farm Home Run Derby.

Just in case anyone cares.

In a marathon mashathon that took over three hours to complete and contained approximately 4,732 horrible one-liners from Chris Berman, Guerrero clubbed 17 homers in the early rounds and then bested finalist Alex Rios 3-2 in the championship round to take home the coveted trophy.

The contest started out slowly, with the leaders after one round tallying just five homers, the fewest for a first round leader since 1995, but as the contest dragged on the remaining sluggers picked up the pace.

The biggest surprise may have been defending champ Ryan Howard getting eliminated in the first round after hitting a paltry two longballs; joining him on the bench were the two guys with the most homers at the break who were in the contest: Justin Morneau (24) and Prince Fielder (29).

I thought it was my duty to print this picture of Papi and Erin Andrews, just because...

As the shadows covered the field the players started to see the ball better, resulting in more shots being hit-and at greater distances-later in the event. Pujols and late addition Matt Holiday joined Vlad & Rios in the second round before the latter two advanced to the finals.

But the highlight of the night, other than Guerrero's gargantuan 503-ft. blast that nearly landed in the giant baseball mitt far beyond the centerfield wall, was when Big Papi gave a friendly assist to his good pal after Vlad started the contest with three straight misfires.

Carrying a large wooden case and a big grin, Ortiz strode to home plate, opened the box and pulled out a pristine wooden bat, a scene reminiscent of "The Natural", only instead of Robert Redford wowing some cute kid it was a couple of happy-go-lucky, hard swinging Dominicans pleasing a nation of adoring fans.

After smooching the lumber for good luck, Papi handed the stick to Guerrero, and Vlad immediately went on to homer on five of his next nine swings and cruise to the finals, where he outlasted a tired Rios.

The fact that Guerrero later admitted the bat was really his and that he and Ortiz "had it planned that if I wasn't doing well at the beginning, he was going to bring it out to me," didn't diminish the moment, one of the few genuinely entertaining parts of a long night of longballs.

Sox All Star closer Jonathan Papelbon takes in the Derby action

Glad that's finally over with. Now we can get to the real entertainment of the evening: the Celebrity/Legends All Star Softball Challenge.

Cause nothing beats watching Kenny Mayne and Jimmy Kimmell try and out-funny each other while a bunch of prima donnas and overweight former athletes try to avoid tearing any ligaments while playing on a miniaturized field.

Oh and you can best ESPN was pissed that the fading Derby pushed back the premiere of its mega-hyped miniseries, "The Bronx is Burning."

Glad they had to suffer as much as we did.