Bullpen meltdown costs Sox shot at DH sweep

Angels 7, Sox 5
WP: F. Rodriguez (5-2)
LP: Gagne (3-1)
HRs: LAA-Matthews (16)

SUMMARY
For six innings the Sox looked dead in the water, held scoreless by Earvin Santana, until a late comeback gave the team hope. But Manny Delcarmen surrendered two runs in the 8th, and after Boston bounced back with four in the bottom of the inning, Eric Gagne coughed up three in the 9th for another demoralizing loss.

#1 STUNNER Santana 6.1IP, 4H, 1ER, 0BB, 5K
The struggling starter was called up before the game for his first start in a month, carried an ERA over 6.00 into the contest, then shut down the Boston offense for six plus innings.

PAN's FAUN Gagne 1IP, 3H, 3ER, 33P, BS, L
MotherfuckingcocksuckingCanadianbaconlovingSethRogenlookingwashedupdouchebag can go back to fucking Texas, California, Canada or anywhere they want his sorry, goateed, flabby, floppyhaired, goggle-eyed ass!

Nation, we must unite in producing a curse that will prevent this man from ever taking the mound in a Boston uni again!

SUMMARY
What the fuck just happened?

In the blink of an eye a potential banner day in Beantown was washed away in a flood of fortuitous base hits and faulty pitches, and before anyone could even register what they had witnessed, the Sox split a doubleheader that just minutes earlier it looked like it was destined to sweep.

That's what happens when the so-called best bullpen in baseball suddenly goes all Amy Winehouse, wasting another solid start by Josh Beckett and turning a feel-good come-from-behind win into the kind of loss that sparks fights with spouses and causes beer intake to rise dramatically throughout the Nation.

Label it alcoholic spousal abuse, brought to you by Eric Effin Gagne.

For the third time in a week and seemingly the umpteenth time since he first donned the Boston uniform three weeks ago, Gagne imploded on the mound and coughed up a Boston lead, blowing a save for the second time since Sunday and erasing what could have been one of Boston's biggest wins of the season.

All while Jonathan Papelbon sat in the pen and watched.

Look, I know Tito wants to be careful with the closer, and he did throw 22 pitches in the opener, but would his arm really had fallen off if he came in to close this one out?

After all, it's not every day this club comes back in a big way in the later innings against a quality club like the Angles, let alone with the chance to hang a doubleheader sweep on the second best team in baseball.

The ironic part about the whole thing is that for most of the evening it looked as if Boston was going to go down without a fight, barely able to scratch out a hit let alone score a run off suddenly stingy spot starter Santana.

The former Angel ace had been battered so badly this season that he was put on the AAA shuttle back in July after a dismantling at the hands of the Devil Rays, and was only brought back today to fill in due to the double dip.

The 24-year-old did more than fill in as he held Boston hitless for 4 1/3 innings while his mates built a 2-0 lead thanks to some key hits and ghastly fielding by Julio Lugo.

Beckett (7IP, 5H, 2R, 1ER, 1BB, 8K) worked out of a two on, two out jam fueled by Lugo's bobble of an Orlando Cabrera grounder in the first inning, but Anaheim touched him for a run in the third when Cabrera singled and Vlad Guerrero, who was a beast in this game, doubled deep into the left field corner for a 1-0 LA lead.

After misplaying another ball that was fortunately scored as the first ML base hit for rookie catcher Ryan Budde, Lugo's third miscue of the game would come back to bite Boston & Beckett in the sixth.

Guerrero (3-5, 2R, 2 2B, 3B, 3BI) hit a routine grounder to lead off the inning that Lugo bobbled & butchered for his 6th error in his last 13 games, and after Garret Anderson singled him over to third and Gary Matthroids struck out, Sox killer Maicer Izturis dumped a single into right that scored Vlad with the unearned run, and Boston trailed 2-0 after six.

Meanwhile Santana was pitching like his namesake, Johan; Boston's first hit of the night was a bloop single by J.D. Drew in the 5th, and even though Lugo tried to atone for his gaffes with a solid double to the triangle in the 6th, Santana retired Jacoby Ellsbury and Pedroia to escape the frame unscathed.

But things would finally change in the 7th as Boston scored a run on a single by Papi, a double by Drew (2-4) and after Justin Speier replaced Santana, an RBI groundout by Mike Lowell that cut the deficit to a manageable 2-1.

Then came Bullpen Meltdown #1.

Manny Delcarmen got the call to replace Beckett in the 8th and immediately turned the close game into what seemed like an impossible dream.

His line looked like this: Guerrero triple on 1st pitch, Anderson sac fly 2 pitches later, Matthroids 2-run homer three pitches later.

Six pitches, three runs, and that 2-1 lead was now 4-1 with Angels closer Francisco Rodriguez waiting in the pen.

Time to pack it in?

C'mon, it's the fucking Sox.

In the bottom of the 8th Boston staged one of those 2004-esque comebacks, an aspect of their game that had been sorely lacking so far this season but one that has started to reappear lately.

And just like '04, Big Papi was right in the middle of the action.

Reliever Scot Shields retired Eric Hinske to start the inning, then proceeded to walk Lugo and Ellsbury and allow a solid single to Pedroia to load the bases.

As Coco came in to run for Pedroia, Rodriguez entered the game for the Halos in hopes of recording the rare 5-out save.

No tonight, K-Rod.

With Ortiz standing at the plate Rodriguez uncorked a wild pitch that (barely) scored Lugo from third and advanced the other runners up a base, and on the next pitch Papi (2-4, 2R, 2BI) scorched a double to the left centerfield gap that brought Ellsbury & Crisp home to tie the game, and suddenly the park was rocking like it was 2004 again.

One pitch later Manny laced a shot down the third base line that rattled around the corner long enough to score Papi with the go-ahead run, and at this point everyone watching thought, shit, it is 2004 again.

Alas Drew grounded out and Lowell flied out to end the rally, but the damage was done, and all Boston had to do was record three quick outs and the sweet double header sweep was all theirs.

Except instead of the menacing glare and 97 mph heater of Papelbon on the mound, the Angels saw the roly-poly 92 mph Cheez Whiz of closer-turned-clown Gagne staring at them from behind befuddled, bespectacled eyes.

Exact excerpt from my notes: Gagne's on for the save. Oh shit.

Things started off badly when pinch hitter Reggie Willits took Gagne to 13 pitches before finally flying out, and I couldn't help but think if he needed that many tosses to retire Reggie freaking Willits, we're in trouble.

Things got worse as Gagne followed that adventure by walking pinch hitter Casey Kotchman on five pitches, and then the proverbial wheels fell off, and the worst part about it was it was like witnessing a car crash in horrible, super-slow motion.

Chone Figgins singled to right, sending pinch runner Manny Aybar to third, and O.C. needed just two pitches to rip a single to left that scored Aybar to tie the game; by the time Vlad crushed a 2-run double two pitches later , the boos were cascading down so hard on Gagne you'd have sworn they were yelling "Yooooooooouuuukkk".

Interestingly enough the next two big plays would involve Youk, who replaced Hinske to start the 9th: he speared a liner by Anderson for an inning-ending double play, then was tossed, along with Tito, for arguing a strike three call on a ball he foul tipped in the bottom of the inning.

So an afternoon that began with so much joy came to a bitter conclusion, but at least we know that the next time Gagne takes the mound we can just turn off set and go about our lives, secure in the knowledge that this man will probably never have a quality outing in a Boston uniform.

Unless they're playing the D-Rays.